Cont’d from last week.
It’s hard to believe in a world that brings us the Jersey Shore and Here Comes Honey Boo-Boo, but women like a man with a well-hung brain. Too many men seem to believe that learning ends as soon as you’re handed a degree (if not sooner) while others seem to prefer to passively absorb whatever information comes their way.
Men who kindle their intellect, people who indulge a love of learning for learning’s sake on the other hand… they have passion. They take an active role in their own lives, seeking out new experiences and trying to improve themselves and their understanding of the world. These tend to be people with drive and ambition, rather than being someone who’s content to let the world pass them by while they kill time playing Call of Duty: None More Black Ops. A person who wants to cultivate their intellectual curiosity is someone who pays attention to the world around them and wants to engage in it, rather than being spoon-fed.
A Sense of Humor
Ask any woman what she’s looking for in a romantic partner and you will inevitably hear “a sense of humor” or “someone who can make me laugh”. A sense of humor is perhaps the number one most desirable trait a man can have when it comes to meeting women.
Humor is incredibly important when it comes to building rapport with people. Being able to make each other laugh is like a relationship shortcut; when your sense of humor matches up with somebody else’s, they feel closer to you almost instantly. Everyone I know who is good with women is able to make them laugh – a genuine, “Oh God, please, I’m about to hurt something” laugh, not the strained “Oh god how long do I have to tolerate this person before the social contract say I can leave” titter through clenched teeth. The more highly a woman appreciates a man’s sense of humor, the greater the likelihood that she will be romantically interested in him. A good sense of humor – a compatible one, makes men seem much more desirable as a partner.
Why? Well, to start with, men with good senses of humor are seen as being more socially intelligent and experienced; after all, knowing how to make someone laugh without making them uncomfortable is a skill that takes practice and experience. But, importantly, laughter also affects us on a chemical level; it helps promote the production serotonin, which decreases stress toxins in the blood. It hyper-oxygenates the blood, helping the brain to function more efficiently. In other words: laughter makes us feel better physically. Being able to make a woman laugh means you’re able to make her feel good.
But… What about looks?
Now, nobody is saying that looks aren’t an important part of attraction. But at the same time, they’re not the end-all, be-all either – despite what men often tell themselves. While men gripe and moan about how only men with washboard abs and rock-hard Pecs can get the ladies, the responses to my informal poll were about as scattershot as one could get. Some women adore bald men, others get weak in the knees for long hair and others will only date men with short hair. Some want their men clean-shaven, others love facial hair with the passion of a thousand suns. Some women loved big burly men while others like skinny nerd-boys who look like the kid they could’ve met at Hebrew school.
The only feature that most women seemed to universally desire were nice shoulders. Shoulders seem to be the one thing women could agree on. Good figure, hairy, hairless, brunette, blonde, brown-eyed, blue-eyed… for every five women, you’d get six responses. Most women who mentioned looks preferred someone who cared about their appearance – someone who took the time to make themselves look nice rather than giving the impression that they had been attacked by a sentient pile of dirty laundry after having not shaved for four days. Same with body types; women cared more that guys took care of themselves than that they looked like an Abercrombie and Fitch model. But while you’re working on your lath raises and upright rows, think on this: women respond far more to drive and behavior than to looks. Spending a little more time brushing up on your feminist theory, building your confidence and cultivating your love for British television will go further to finding you the partner of your dreams.